Frequently Asked Questions

I have left my partner and taken the children to my Mum's home. Can I stop him from picking up the children from school?

Both parents have the right to pick up children from school, and the school will rightly be concerned if there is any possible dispute, but most of all if there is any doubt about the child's safety. Make sure the Head Teacher knows what is happening, and ask your solicitor for advice about a Prohibited Steps Order if there is a real likelihood of abduction

I wasn't married to my children's mother, but we lived together for five years and my name is on their birth certificates. Do I have any rights?

An unmarried father has no rights as such, and will need Parental Responsibility which can be agreed through a Parental Responsibility Agreement or by Court Order. A father who is recorded on the birth certificate and who can demonstrate a real commitment to his child can normally expect to be awarded the right to be treated as the legal father with full parental rights.

My 13 year old son has been staying with me and my new wife over the summer holidays. He's supposed to go home tomorrow but says he is frightened of my ex-wife's boyfriend. Does he have to go back?

Holidays are always a time for relaxation and reflection, and not many of us want to go back to work afterwards. So too with children - but to refuse to return a child after a contact visit is in law a 'snatch' and some judges will make orders on the spot for their return without listening to the arguments. Unless there is real concern of significant harm, judges will make those orders to maintain stability. If there are real problems, and of course a 13 year old child's views will be listened to, then an immediate application for an Interim Residence Order is needed.

My ex-partner wants to have the children to stay over at weekends but I know his girlfriend will be there. Can I insist on him seeing them alone?

Contact disputes are more often battles between parents than disputes about what is best for the children. When couples split up, they will - hopefully - start new lives, but the process can often be painful. It's even worse for the children, who can shoulder the blame themselves too, thinking that they were responsible for their parents' problems. Be alert to that.
Above all, parents need to find a way to talk about their concerns. Mediation is immensely helpful, with a third party with no axe to grind. It may also help to set up a meeting outside either home, on 'neutral ground', to talk about practical things.

I'm 14 and I want to go and live with my aunt. She's spoken to someone who suggests I should apply to a court for this to happen. How do I do this ?

Any child or young person is entitled to advice but the law only allows them to apply to a Court for an order through a solicitor and to the High Court. It would be better if your aunt was herself to make an application for a Residence Order. In disputes between parents a child may obtain independent advice but the circumstances when he or she would be separately represented by a solicitor are still rare.
You can get independent advice though from:
National Youth Advocacy Service

Lawyers for Young People